Maudlin as Hell

Just need to spew....get this out of me. This, yeah, these things of my chest.

Thing the first, became really --really sad last night looking at old pictures. Rapidly coming to the realization that I may not have kids of my own. I've gone into the realm of the hopeless (and me with my change focus during the election...ha!). Feel like I'm not going to contribute to the family tree--and among other things, that really REALLY bothers me. It never occurred to me while growing up that I wouldn't be married or have kids. Here's me still single. Feeling mighty mighty lonely. I'm sure you're so happy to share in my angst.

The second thing....am irrationally upset that my cousin, "knows a lot about our grandmother's parents" and was given a locket that belonged to our grandmother. I don't have anything of hers. I would rather not wait until grammy passes away to get something sentimental. I get pissed that all my cousins didn't/don't appreciate their proximity to our grandparents. Living 3,000 miles away, I often felt as though sistah dubh and I were secondary.

SIGH